How bad is it really?

• Banks are now sending out pre-declined credit card notices
• When I hit the drive thru the other day the kid in the window asked me "can you afford fries with this?"
• The latest big business deals are now being made on the 18th hole at Bert's mini-golf.
• If your bank returns your check marked "Insufficient Funds" you have to call them to clarify whether they meant you or the bank.
• Stock prices are higher for Hot Wheels and Matchbox than GM.
• Parents in Beverly Hills and Hollywood are firing their nannies and learning their kids' names.
• A truckload of Americans were caught trying to sneak into Mexico.
• Dick Cheney took his broker hunting.
• Motel Six is no longer leaving the light on for you.
• The Mob is laying off judges.
• Congress is investigating Bernie Madoff.  Yes, that's right.  The man who made $50 billion disappear is being investigated by the men who made $15 trillion disappear.
• A buddy was so depressed about the state of the country and the economy that he called the suicide prevention line.  He was connected to a call center in Pakistan.  When he told them he was having suicidal thoughts they got very excited and asked if he could drive a truck.