I haven’t been writing anything of theological content because I can’t stomach the hypocrisy of theologizing and pontificating when I don’t even live a moral Christian life. I started writing something smart-sounding the other day and had to stop myself. Sorry, but I just burst out laughing and deleted the whole thing. I’m starting to wish I had never learned words like “hesychasm”, “monologic self-repeating perpetual prayer of the heart”, “energies/essence”, “penal substitution theory of the atonement”, “hermeneutic”, or “ceasaropapism”. In short, I wish I’d never learned a word that I could use as a weapon towards someone else or as a way of making myself feel like my praxis-less Christianity actually means something. Maybe if I can acquire the moral awareness of a 10 year old catechumen, I’ll talk theology. It has been exceedingly stupid of me to speak at lengths about an interior life the likes of which I have no firsthand knowledge, and I intend to remedy that.
Thursday, November 30, 2006
Julio over at Hispania Sancta has posted an extremely powerful essay. This brings introspection to a new level. I will only excerpt a small part of it. This is one of the better blog posts I have run across in a while.