Thursday, September 15, 2016

Pandas aren't cute, they're death-loving oxygen-thieves. Let's just eat the idiot-bears

Let me get straight to the point. Pandas are pointless, wasteful and silly. They should die.

Let’s look at the facts here. A lot of conservationists argue that pandas are the victims of man’s actions, that urbanisation and industrialisation is killing the precious bamboo they need to live.

Eh? Bamboo? They are bears, but they eat leaves. Hello, excuse me? Panda bear. Bear. You know, large, aggressive carnivore. Big teeth, claws. Grrrr. You’re supposed to eat meat.

What on earth is with the bamboo thing? A panda’s digestive system is still set up to digest meat. The reason they can only eat only one of the hundreds of different types of bamboo the world has to offer is that their guts aren’t supposed to break down bamboo. It’s elevating fussiness to the level of suicide. It’s like me eating only car tyres and gravel and then asking for sympathy when I starve to death. Idiots.

Read the rest here.

3 comments:

The Anti-Gnostic said...

In all seriousness, we will probably start breeding them for domestication.

Han said...

We are going to really regret getting rid of pandas when the all-powerful space probe head toward earth to figure out why they have stopped communicating. I know about these sort of things. I saw the movie.

Anonymous said...

Thank you, Han for the chuckles..;)